You triggered me and tested my mental limits and limitations.
You have insulted me, belittled me, you dismissed and deprecated my job, my passion, my efforts, my selfless services, my hard work, our house and what we have. You can compare with others and senselessly made me feel guilty for no fault of mine. You told utter lies and false stories to everyone just to hide your insecurities, misbehaviour, and wrongdoing.
You have hurt me and that is the best thing that happened to me. You made me search for meaning in everything.
To deal with the stressful circumstances, I searched for various means to cope up. In the process I learnt the value of human life and value of service and value of living for something greater than ourselves.
I learnt about fitness, nutrition, and supplementation. All these made be a better and stronger person. Now I am not only serving myself but also helping lot of people to get better.
In the process of handle the conflicts between us and to deal with the life given to me, I read a lot of books on health, mindset, emotional health, listened to expert interviews and videos for thousands of hours, listened to many audio books. I self-taught and self-healed to a large extent. I have grown through the pain.
I realize that I am born for some bigger purpose and started to work towards something bigger than myself.
I am uncontrollably working on myself, learning, and improving. I started to believe that all this is not meant for me but for someone out there who is waiting to get healed because of me. I cannot stop and must not stop at any cost because I am going to leave a void if I quit. I will suffer and struggle until I lead a life that is purposeful to others and meaningful to me. A person like me is not meant for self but for to bring in a change in the society. To be an inspiration and a leader who brings a different perspective to the world. To think differently and do things differently. For the betterment of the society. To come out the victim mentality and take charge of our lives. I will not quit and give up as some people’s lives are dependent on me and I will not deprive them of my presence and impact.
Biggest benefit of all the is that I recognized that I must not be a people pleaser any more.
My worth does not come from meeting your needs, fancies, desires and requirements continuously. My self worth will not go down if you do not approve or insult me. My self-worth comes from what I believe about myself, my hard work and selfless service. Please those who love me will recognize this.
I agree to your very foolish needs and then I feel very bad in my heart that I should not have agreed to that. Anyway you will misbehave for anything that happens and comes in your mind, so I will choose to stick to what is right.
I will stop over explaining everything to you. You are an adult , if you strongly feel that you are absolutely right, do it. You can ask for suggestions from others and you can do whatever is in your control.
From now on I will not feel guilty for your bad emotional behaviour and rude attitude.
From now on I will just sit in my disappointment, sadness, misery and pain if you insult or misbehave with me. I will learn to stay calm. I will not react to all the insults that you throw at me or my family because I know who I am and what kind of service I am doing for everyone. Your rude attitude to hurt me shows your character and not mine.
I will choose to take the right decision and choices and stand by my word if I believe in heart that it is the right thing to do. At the same time I will not stop you from anything that you like to do in your capacity. Whether I do what you like or not, you will anyway get irritated for anything, so it is better to stick to my own beliefs instead of giving in to your tantrums.
I am not responsible for your negative emotional state and happiness. I can share happiness with you through life journeys, experiences, events etc., but I cannot make you happy. I can provide all the support to do things to be happy.
Happiness comes from what you do by yourself and for yourself. Happiness needs effort, work and time. Any happiness without effort does not last long. Happiness cannot be bought. Hope you will realize that some day.
I respect my limits and boundaries. I do not cross them just to meet your childish desires.
I will take care of myself by following a healthy lifestyle, with self discipline, responsibility, commitment, consistency, integrity and honesty throughout my life. This is who I am and this is the foundation of my personality.
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