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Status in a community is important to us

Historically we all long for connection and not only connection we want a community and when we have a community we want to have some control and power. We strive for a status in the community and we want to race to the ranks of the community.

People who are into cults and new religious groups are generally people who come from deprived part of the society. People who are discriminated join some kind of cult or a community which gives them some identity. They get a sense of control over their life by following the rules and routine defined by the cult leader. They find themselves to be a valued member of a group who are following a common set of ideals and they find status it it.

~Praveen Jada

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I started following individuals rather than big organizations for information

I started to trust individuals rather than blindly believing organisations and systems that are running over us.
A government or an organisation would fall down to the lowest member of the group. That means the integrity of an organisation is equal to the most corrupt people in the organisation because people having low morality and ethics can rig the system. They can be ruthless and blunt. Those kind of people do not care for anything apart from themselves and their hidden goals. They can climb to the top and influence lot of decisions.

~Praveen Jada

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You need to be angry when you break your standards

You can stick to anything in life and be committed only if you have standards and systems defined for yourself. At the same time more importantly you need to get angry disappointed frustrated with yourself when you break the standards that you define for yourself. When you are not acting in line with your values, when you are not yourself and do not have the discipline to make yourself accountable for your decisions, then breaking them and neglecting them becomes a habit. You do more of it to feel less guilty and make it normal. If you do no hate breaking the standard that you defined for yourself, you will keep repeating until it becomes normal to you. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy for your to come up with silly reasons for not doing what you are supposed to do.

~Praveen Jada

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Unhappy people will often be upset by your happiness

Unhappy people will often be upset by your happiness. Don’t ever make the mistake of apologizing for it. There’s no such thing as a bad emotion—only bad reactions to emotions.

If you cringe at your former self, that’s good—it means you’ve grown. Never stop cringing. It’s impossible to be a life-changing presence to some without also being a complete joke to others.

Hurt people hurt others.

~Praveen Jada

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Why we cannot do tough things that are good for us in long term

Anybody can deal with the difficult situations today and go through hardship today if we are sure of a bright and happy future. If we are guaranteed a positive outcome that we would get in so and so date and time, then we can easily struggle for a better future. But since life does not give us this kind of surety and certainty, many people fail to develop the faith and hope to start with something that does not give instant pleasure and happiness.

It is not because things are difficult that we do not dare, it is because we do not dare that the things are difficult.

~Praveen Jada

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Freedom ‘to’ VS Freedom ‘from’

There is a lot of difference between trying to be free from something and trying to be free to do something. We should always try to gain freedom to do something rather than getting freedom from something. So when you strive be someone who is self-reliant, who has control to do what you love and work on something that matters to you and others, you would automatically get the freedom from the things that you don’t want in life.

~Praveen Jada

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Don’t say system is unfair, move forward by saying that your situation is unfair

You need to point out what is going wrong in your life instead of saying your life is going bad because the system is wrong. Believing that entire system is unfair would cripple you and paralyze you but believing that your situation is unfair would help you to focus on resolving your issue. Blaming the system is easy way to deny your responsibility for your life. Complaining everything and everyone around you may take some burden off of your shoulder for a moment but nothing is going to improve in your life. Feeling like a victim and helpless would do nothing more than making things worse.

Remember that you must not turn a bad situation into a worse situation.

~Praveen Jada

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Being exceptional would create an external conflict

Living up to the others expectations would create internal conflict whereas being exceptional would create an external conflict.

When you fit in and cut your corners to lead your life, you are most probably not living up to your expectations but you are living up to other expectations. You not be living true to your believes and values in life. You are not moving towards realizing your dreams. You most probably are compromising your truth. Hence you would be the state of low grade anxiety and have a sense of not being in control of your life. So in order to compensate for your lack of agency, you would get yourself driving tasks that are important to others or spend time browsing, binge watching, snacking, gossiping etc,. You would give a impression of being busy by doing stuff that is not important and not urgent.

When you are exceptional and making use of your uniqueness, then you are doing what most people are not willing to do. You want most people don’t want in their life. You are willing to raise your standards when everyone is just doing enough to get through the day, you keep showing up, you pick up yourself when you fall down, you have a routine and don’t quit in middle. You see the finish line when majority of people focus on giving excuses and look out for reasons to give up on their decisions. When you are going in a different path, thinking and behaving differently you get different results. When you go against the common thinking of your close family members and when you do something that separates you from majority of the people around, then you will be misunderstood. Many people ignore you or ridicule you or reject you or attack you because you are forcing them to question their self-deprecating beliefs and self-fulfilling prophecies.

~Praveen Jada

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Live a lifetime in a day by doing these things

  • Spend time on these 6 things daily,
  • Having child like attitude and doing certain activities that you have been passionate right from your early years
  • A job that allows you to live a quality life
  • Solitude – Spend some time alone
  • Purpose – Working on something that is bigger than you and that may help others
  • Family and community – Spend time with family members and be apart of a community
  • Retirement – Think of how your retirement want to be like and do a little to realize that dream.

~Praveen Jada

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Examples of strength of our addictions

I have two examples which will say that we will do what we want to do and we will believe in what we want to believe and we will consume what we want to consume even if it is harmful to us .

Cigarette smoking is injurious to health and drinking alcohol is injurious to health. They are written on the labels of the products, harmful effects of consuming them are proven in many scientific and medical journals, they are not allowed to be advertised in media, all doctors strictly asks patients to stop smoking and drinking. Yet many people continue to do so at their own peril.

~Praveen Jada

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Happy in life is different from happy with life

Happy in life is different from happy with life. You are happy in your life when you are doing something to create positive feelings. You are happy with your life when you are creating positive feelings associated with the gifts and resources that you already have in life. Being happy with your life is being grateful to what you have in life.

Never let a crisis go wasted.

~Praveen Jada

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