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Lesser options will give more clarity

I have realise that having more options, wanting more in life, desiring more of what you already have, having more money, more happiness, more of material things, more of enjoyment is not going to give me full satisfaction and make me peaceful at the end of my life.

I personally have learnt through experience and by reading various books that having less having less options, being resourceful with the available resources, doing the best that you could do with what you have and where you are is going to give greater satisfaction.

At the matured years of my life the most important thing is that it is not about me and it is more about the future generations it is more about my kid and giving the best and making him the best.

~Praveen Jada

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Do what you are supposed to do

There are things that you are supposed to do but not doing and there are things that you supposedly love to do but you are not doing.

If you miss to do and handle these two categories in your life then it is a sure shot way of leading your life that is desperate, that is directionless, that is no significance.

Not attending to your own ‘Musts’ in life which you value the most and not developing yourself to realize your dreams, would make you work for others dreams and ambitions. Your day to day happenings would take over the direction of your life and after many years you would realize that you did not take care of yourself and your needs.

~Praveen Jada

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Exchanging what works with what sounds good is a bad idea

In past few years especially with accessibility to internet and advent of social media we lost our ability to wait for results and want instant pleasure. Our patience and attention span has reduced.

What is long lasting, what gives you delight and peace of mind, what give your real satisfaction in the long run has been replaced by what feels good at this moment.

As someone said last 30 years have been marked by exchanging what works with what sounds good.

~Praveen Jada

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Some valuable thoughts from well meaning people

Values equals what do you spend your time now and what do you spend your money on.

Sleep is a discipline. It has been proven in numerous studies that lack of sleep hampers your ability to think well. You take impulsive decisions which are most probably not best for you or others.

Discipline is about being aware of your thoughts and either approving them or not approving them. Discipline is about having the courage to say yes to things that work for you and no to things that are not worth.

Think not what do I write, about what do I think about, what do I want to be true, but what changes are you going to make to make your ideal a reality.

At a time where we’re stuck in the ‘feeling’ generation we do things because we want to ‘feel’ a certain way but then when we feel things we don’t know what to do with it. So I’ll give an example of what I mean by that – when
we feel guilt most of us don’t know how to shift from that feeling into thinking and doing something different in order to not to feel that guilt again . If we want to feel happy we just try and feel happy not realizing that you have to change your thoughts and what you do in order to feel happiness or whatever.

Happiness is cannot be pursued but it must ensue because it is a result of all those small mundane and repetitive things that are done for a prolonged period of time. It’s the result of getting those small and big things right and then you just feel this kind of feeling of Happiness as a byproduct. you don’t as you said you don’t go today I must feel happy right it’s it’s the result of having meaning and purpose and and taking the right actions

Control what you put in not the outcome which may or may not happen as you expected. We just want the feeling so we try to cheat it or steal it or we feel guilty that we don’t have it. When really you could start small right now and just get yourself closer to it.

It is going to be unpleasant to get in there and put in the time and effort but we need to force ourselves until we reach the momentum. That’s the muscle that you want to cultivate yeah. I think people want to be the person on the other side of that wall but they don’t realize that the way you do it is by just starting it slow and be consistent with it.

Seneca points us out on one of his letters we’ll push ourselves, we’ll take risks to succeed financially, to succeed in business, to succeed in our careers, to buttress our reputations but then we don’t want to do it in the other places where most of us would admit it actually matters.

People will become people they don’t want to be in order to achieve something that they are not passionate about. They end up doing well but inherently they suffer because they want something else in life. The pursuit of doing it inwardly with your family with your friendships, chances are you’ll become the person you want to be like chances are you’ll become someone that you’re proud of being.

It’s like look optimizing your professional life or maximizing your professional life very unlikely to improve your personal life but if you have optimized and maximized and improved your personal life, got your house in order, you’re going to be better at what you do. You’re going to care less in some degrees about things that used to bother you so much.

That’s the beauty of process. You get great by minor improvements compounded on top of each other showing up day in and day out All of humanity’s problems arise because of the inability to sit quietly alone for 30 minutes as Pascal said.

Not to be physically still but have the Mind still while the body is in motion. This requires like so much discipline so much self-control so much self-awareness. A lot of people are just doing doing doing and they’re not even aware they’re running away from something they’re not even aware of that it makes them uncomfortable to be still and observe their thoughts.

Discipline is not just squeezing blood from the stone it’s not just whipping yourself. It’s trying, failing, learning, unlearning through out the journey while having a clear direction and goals. You’re not supposed to really ever get there but that it’s like the Horizon it’s always a little bit further away.

Always consider the problems and challenges and mishaps and tragedies as playground for your practice. Whenever something unexpected and someone behaves in an unfavourable way , say that this is also a practice and work with the situation.

Most of the times we get overwhelmed by the situation in front of us or we lose hope just by visualizing the amount of time, effort it takes or not have faith that we will get the results if we try it long enough. But the real method is to do it a little bit today and keep doing and pursuing the things little by little daily consistently. After a while, it turns out to be a beautiful result.

Unflinchingly accept the reality of that situation, the unfairness the, unexpectedness of it, your blamelessness or your blame worthiness for it, and then simultaneously say that this is wonderful that it happened but I can make choices now. The Stockdale Paradox is a technique to navigate challenging and ambiguous times by combining the ability to confront the brutal facts of your current reality, even as you maintain unwavering faith that you will prevail in the end, no matter how distant that is.

You’re setting yourself up for disappointment or frustration or
resentment or despair by attaching to an outcome that’s not yours. There are so many variables and unforeseen circumstances which could impact the result either negatively or positively. If you get lucky sure you’ll feel wonderful. But for instance if you work for years on a book then success or failure of it depends on your expectations. What is your meaning of a successful book. Did It win awards, did it sell lots of copies, did your
parents read it , did your spouse and children find it valuable, did you get a lot of money out it. Those are things that are not in your control but if you attach your definition of success to things like how much you learnt while writing the book, how many new things you learnt, how confident you became as a person, how fulfilled you feel because you finished the book which may be helping someone out there etc,. you are already celebrating the work you did and you are experience the joy of success without validation from external factors.

The work that you’re doing now is the result of work I did a long time ago and have been doing ever since. Success a lagging indicator of discipline, faith, sacrifice, commitment, study and practice. The work you are doing right now may bear fruits after 10 years or 15 years or may be later. Anything that you are working on for a greater purpose is a leap in the dark and you have to continually take that leap with faith that it works out.

The hard work I put in and the effort and time i dedicate in pursuing something may work or may not work. But that is the trait of a creator or someone who wants to do it for the sake of doing it. That makes you a person who goes against the tide. That makes you leader and not a follower.

~Praveen Jada

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State of our health care system

Our healthcare system is interested in quick fixes and and modern drugs/medicines gives patients instant relief from the pain and trauma .
Healthcare and food industry capitalizes on our evolutionary psychological instincts like seeking instant pleasure our delayed gratification, avoiding pain and struggle, conserving energy instead of putting in effort, our impulse to survive by predicting and protecting ourselves at any cost etc.,

Modern healthcare system with its advanced technology and medicines does wonderful job when it comes to treating acute health conditions a like pain, trauma, illness due to microbial infections, performing operations for rectifying or removing something, transplanting organs etc., We have an amazing system to take care of us when we are broken already. It can fix what is already broken in a persons body.

Mainstream healthcare is not interested in long answers and detailed analysis of background of a person, our hospitals are over burdened by overload of patients, unfortunately most doctors are stressed out themselves and have little time to spend time with patient, our healthcare system is not designed for long term wellbeing, our healthcare system takes curative approach and not preventative in nature, most of the medical treatments and drugs address the symptoms and do not target the root cause of the real issue.

~Praveen Jada

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The man who loves walking will walk further than the man who loves the destination

Always choose to be in the process and pursue an infinite goal which cannot be achieved in this lifetime. An infinite mindset always trumps a finite mindset. Having a goal and achieving it is finite. It gives you instant pleasure when you win something. If the process of achieving something is a goal, then there is no end to the experience of winning.

As someone said “The man who loves walking will walk further than the man who loves the destination.”

Focusing and giving importance to the process of winning is more important than the victory. Because the journey to victory is the story that makes the victory so much sweeter.

You do not win by getting in shape. You win if you continue staying in shape and get fitter as you get older.

You do not win in business. You win by staying in the business and growing the business .

You do not win in marriage. You win by staying in the marriage and keep improving on the relationships.

Point of the game is to keep playing. You must love playing the game . You must love to be a player instead of winning the game. You win the game by staying in the the game and playing it long enough. This gives you more satisfaction of success in long term.

point of success is to do the things that make you successful. you can say you are winning in your own life in your own way if you are successful in doing things which you love and passionate about.

~Praveen Jada

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Double-think is a powerful marketing strategy

Duble think – having two opposing beliefs and believing both are true. Believing in lies knowing that they are false.

This double think strategy is used my many corporates and media for marketing their products or sell an ideology to common people.


Example are like,
i need to be wealthy to be happy
i need likes on social media to be loved
i need to be pretty to be noticed
i need power and control to be respected
i need to have expensive gadgets for people to value me
i need to eat and stay at luxurious resorts to have nice time

We need to protect ourselves from these marketing and powerful forces from dumbing down and duling the experience of life. What can we do to improve our critical thinking. We need to read, we need to expose ourselves to critical thinkers, we need to be critical on overselves and what we are exposed to, we need to develop beliefs of life that works for us and that works in our best interests, we need to program ourselves with empowering information and have wisdom to apply it life, develop the conscious and rationality to not fall for anything that is marketed in media or social media, as a citizen and voter , develop critical thinking to analyze the agenda of political parties and leaders that run our government to take right decision.

When we feel helpless, hopeless, dependent, desperate we lose the ability of critical thinking and stop striving to be self-reliant. When we neglect our wellbeing, when we ignore the true meaning of our life, when we stop pursuing our passion and purpose in life, when we abuse our gifts, when we don’t realize our true potential, when we fell like a victim and live in self-pity, when we lie to ourselves to stay in our comfort zone, when we give up on improving ourselves physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually – This way we will not feel the true sense of divine power.

~Praveen Jada

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Talk about your dreams and passion more often than not

When someone asked what is your plan, we immediately answer our plans for the day or next day or what we do on weekend or like where we are going with family, how we are going to spend our time doing different activities in the immediate future. These are all fine and all of us need to do stuff which gives us instant pleasure and happiness. Having joy is absolute necessary in our lives.

At the same time when we need to tell others about our long term plans, we never talk about our dreams. When someone asks about how is our life going, we never talk about our passion and our inner desire to to not only work on something we love and find meaning in. We never talk and think about what we really want to do that makes us alive and energetic.

We keep ourselves busy by doing things that we need to do. Yes, we must do things that we need to do like taking care of our loved ones, handling urgent requirements in our personal and professional lives, when someone urgently need our help, attending some important life events, spending time with loved ones, having social fun etc., However we need to think about who are if we strip off all the titles we are given by others like job title or a being a husband or a wife or a son or a sister etc., Who are you and what do you say about yourself. How do you see yourself and what could you offer . What do you love to do and how does it matter to you and to others. How do you see yourself doing in the long term. What is the progress you are making at personal level. What are you learning and developing yourself.

We need to talk to ourselves about our passion and purpose , our vision and mission more often then the immediate plans, activities and desires. We need to water our inner desire to be significant and nurture our dreams. We need to be proud to talk to others about our long terms plans and who we really want to be in life.

~Praveen Jada

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God gives us opportunities to become who we are supposed to become – only if we recognize

God is love
God is justice
God is nothing but hope and faith

Deriving meaning out of tragedy is difficult, but if one has faith then everything that happens to us can be meaningful. Life happens FOR us only if we see meaning in it. Life happens TO us if we don’t assign a meaning to it.

  • As someone said,
  • I asked for strength and god gave me difficulties to me strong.
  • I asked for wisdom, god gave me problems to solve.
  • I asked for courage, god gave me dangers to overcome.
  • I asked for love, god gave me troubled people to empower.

~Praveen Jada

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You gain confidence when you do things that you cannot do

Courage comes before confidence. Courage is feeling the fear and moving ahead. Courage is continuing to step ahead in spite of fear. When you face the fear and overcome it, you build courage.

Courage gives you confidence to take on new ventures. You gain confidence only when you do things you know that you cannot do. But you take the risk of doing it for your own good, when you do it again and again with minor improvements and victories, you gain confidence. Confidence is not something that is in-built and comes out of the box for anyone. You get confident in something when you expose yourself to the situation gain and again. You build confidence brick by brick and step by step. You build confidence by small victories achieved over a period of time.

The more hard stuff you do the more hard stuff you can do. The more you do something that scare you, the more you get courage and confidence to handle stuff that makes you nervous. The more confidence you gain, the less anxious you become in handling uncertain things in life.

~Praveen Jada

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Easy come easy go

If you got it easy and quickly, you would not value it, reason why lottery winner or many sportspersons or some movie stars or some people who become famous and rich very quickly without real reason mostly go broke.
Anything stays with you only when you value it, you maintain it. You will be grounded when you earn it through pain, suffering, failing again and again, slowly. When we build it by taking 3 steps ahead and take 2 steps back due to some failure, we go through the process and journey of building the strength and character to keep what we achieve.

~Praveen Jada

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Impose controlled pain to handle uncontrollables in life

I train and workout so hard not to have the best physique or win some championships or look better or gain respect or have followers. I train and impose controlled pain and suffering every single day of my life so that my body and brain is prepared for unexpected events which that would shake me up. I put myself through voluntary pain and suffering through intense exercise and physical challenges so that I am prepared to handle uncontrollable life events. Any exhausting physical training and development would mostly improve your mental and emotional strength.

If you don’t choose to control what you can control, then you cannot control what you cannot control. Life will be taken over by external events. External stimulus and circumstances will impact your outlook and behaviour and ultimately your decisions.

~Praveen Jada

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It is your responsibility to take care of yourself

If the house is on fire, don’t sit in the fire and think about who started the fire. It is your responsibility to get out of the house and then later you can investegate who is responsible.

Everyone is so hell bent and concerned about the industry, food industry, healthcare industry, drugs, alcohol and other things. People blame government, big food companies, big pharma, law and order for making things worse and difficult for them. But the hard truth is no one is going to come and save you. We need to accept the fact that everyone cares for themselves.

It is your responsibility to develop critical thinking and take decisions which works for you. You need to take responsibility to somehow wade through this world and do stuff that is in your best interests. May be very few people are lucky enough to have all right cards dealt to them, but for majority of us we need to falter, learn and grow our way through this complex world.

~Praveen Jada

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How to forgive our heaters and let go of their comments

Recall that they don’t know me and my fair intentions .
They cant understand what I am doing.
When I am growing and becoming someone different, they feel threatened so they try to hurt me and stop me.
They become anxious because i am raising my standards and that might remind them of their failures and insecurities. Hence they try to vilify and diminish my achievements.
They try to belittle me and dismiss me to suppress their shame.
They cant empathise that i am different and i am doing something different.
I forgive them , if not i am drinking poison and expecting them to suffer.
I empathise with them and not expect them to empathize with me.
I understand that they have completely different background and mindset
altruistically give them the gift of forgiveness.
They just cannot relate to what I am doing and associate with my vision. So I cannot expect them to understand what is going on in my mind.
I genuinely feel that they have the right to criticize and say what they like about me. I have the right and to listen to constructive feedback and reject comments made made to hurt me.
I believe that they have the right to stick to their beliefs and ignorance.
People are complex with very complex problems, so they dont have time to understand me
I care less about what they think about me and say about me.
They are just some words and i decided to ignore the noise.
If what i am doing for my betterment is disturbing them and making them feel guilty, it is their problem and they need to evaluate their outlook towards life.
Moreover, when majority of the people are making fun of what you are doing, ignoring you, then criticizing and demeaning you, attack you but you know in your heart that you are doing the right thing, then it is fair indication that you are doing something that majority of the people around you are not willing to do. So it is natural that you will face some resistance and negativity when you are going against the common thinking and pattern of the society.

~Praveen Jada

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